


An Intervention

by bunnyfication



Category: Doctor Who: Scream of the Shalka, Withnail & I (1986)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Fusion, Alternate Universe - Movie Fusion, Crack, Crossovers & Fandom Fusions, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-09-01
Updated: 2014-09-01
Packaged: 2018-02-15 19:16:46
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 322
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2240355
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bunnyfication/pseuds/bunnyfication
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>There really was something living among the dirty dishes. Or working on it anyway. (Withnail and I/Doctor Who (Scream of the Shalka) fusion.)</p>
            </blockquote>





	An Intervention

Withnail was sloughed on the chair, bottle in one hand and the other absently stroking the butt of the shotgun at the reach of his right, when something cold and sticky wrapped around his ankle.

He glanced down, made a face and then threw one arm over his face theatrically.

“Go away, I’m not that high.” he mumbled, and the hallucination gave a gurgling hiss and crawled higher up his leg. It smelled rather pungently of unwashed dishes.

“I have finally gained physical form again, and will not sit by idly while you do something even more idiotic,” the thing said, and Withnail made another attempt at shaking it away. Ugh.

“If I wanted to listen to nagging I’d have… asked him to stay,” he mumbled, and the hallucination gave a wet snort.

“You are both nearly as bad,” it replied sulkily.

There was a long silence, broken only by rancid dishwater dripping onto an almost equally dirty floor, and then Withnail slowly took his arm from over his face and looked down, his eyes widening in something like horrified fascination.

“What… are you supposed to be my conscience? Didn’t know I had one…”

“Hardly. I will say, though, that you might want to check your pocket.”

Withnail did so, and found a… since when did he keep a pocket watch?

“Did I nick this from someone?” he asked, puzzled, and the hallucination hissed irritably. It looked kind of expensive, maybe he could try to pawn it...

“No! Now open it you idiot!”

He made a face at the Thing, and almost didn’t just out of spite, but… oh, what the hell. Funny, maybe he was high after all, because he could swear he could—

*

The Doctor looked around the apartment that greatly resembled a trash heap.

“Oh,” he said.

"About damn time!" The Master snapped, wetly. 

The Doctor wrinkled his nose. They would really need a better body for him, ASAP.

*


End file.
